Why women should not wear heels

…at least oblivious ones or those who lack common sense.

I do not wear heels but I am not against them.  I actually envy those who can stroll down the street in highest heels possible for a whole day long and be completely fine.  Or are they faking it for the sake of fashion and to look good (…for men?).  The longest I ever last is 30 minutes and the rest becomes torture so I always try to skip them whenever I can.   This summer I discovered ballerina shoes, the women shoes that I can actually wear all day long and look girly!  In the past I used to wear flip-flops all year around but Luxembourg does not seem to be a place to do so… or Europe in general. I’d better not scare the locals!

But anyway, a couple of months ago when we moved into a new apartment, I started bearing a grudge.  The nightmare actually started shortly before that but we will get back to it later.  So every morning at 8 am our neighbour across the hallway one floor below is getting ready for work and heelsbouncing in her heels back and forth until she finally leaves hurried through the hallway banging her way out.  Every time I heard them it was as if I were back in time and the nightmare never ended.   I am convinced that she works for a bank.  If we were in New York, she would be surely working on Wall Street because of the way she leaves her apartment every morning as if she is trying to conquer the world.  I bet she is even singing “these boots (bang) are made (bang) for walking (bang)” on the way out.  I feel sorry for her neighbours right next to her, not mentioning the ones below.  Such a self-absorbed and oblivious woman…

And I think it is a curse that followed us all way from Italy.   A several weeks ago before we moved to a new apartment we were on our honeymoon in Florence.  We stayed in this beautiful Florentine villa of the size of a mansion with large rooms converted into apartments.  Some of them were long time residents, some were rented for vacation only.  It had very high ceilings, stone floors and a feel like of the old castle because once upon a time that part of villa was an old tower.

Not long after we arrived the morning nightmare started.  Every morning around 7-8 am (I told you it is a curse), a woman from outside would walk in and take long wooden steps right next to our bedroom up to the apartment above us.  She would spend the next hour walking back and forth on the stone floor doing whatever she was doing.  We speculated for days… was it a cleaning lady, was it a real estate agent, why every day, why always at the same time, why walking back and forth for an hour??!!! Why in HEELS? The stone floors, the thin wooden walls from the old days carried the sound and echoed in all rooms.  It sounded as a hammer, and I almost wished it was a hammer because then we had a legitimate reason to complain.   For three weeks every morning the nightmare continued, and I was so tempted to take a broom and bang the ceiling, to scream at her, to write a note and stick it in the door…  but if my husband didn’t do it and he is really good and yelling at people for any other occasion, I didn’t dare myself.

So every time I hear heels in the hallway in the morning, it feels like I am back in time.  At that moment I do not know who I loathe more, the oblivious, inconsiderate woman or the man who invented high heels (because I refuse to believe that any woman would do that to herself! :-))